Monday, February 17, 2014

 The ‘Q’ Factor 

             

Chapter 7  


 Three months later the group was still getting together even though Lidia had not come back since that night. Agnes struggled everyday trying not to think of her daughter. The one she let go for her own good now let her go when Agnes didn't want to be let go.  She worked harder with her patchwork making the best she could to place in shows.  She did well with placing each time.  The group was doing well as well.  Amanda would come when she could and show us all the beautiful wall hangings she made for her thriving restaurant. Cindy had settled well into motherhood; young Kathryn was keeping her busy every time they came with touching everything she could get her tiny adorable hands on.
Kathryn reminded Agnes so much of Lidia it hurt to watch this little girl grow up before Agnes’s eyes and not have Lidia to enjoy this as well.
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Another Tuesday night was upon Lidia.   All she could do was think about Aggie and the group.  It had been a few months since she walked out on her “mother”.   She missed the group very much, but she couldn't forgive Agnes for what she had done so long ago.  Lidia found the confidence she had built up from the group soon disappeared.  She was back to hiding her face behind cubicles at work. She started to wear sunglasses to hide her eyes.  She didn't want anyone to look into her soul through her eyes and see the pain she was feeling.   It was bad enough to feel it on her own she didn't want anyone else to feel her pain as well.  After a week of wearing them she liked how she could hide from the world yet still are a part of it.  She thought back to Sandy and wondered how she was doing in the home.  She had heard the Tommy was happy with his adopted parents; mind you he was still young just wait until he is old enough to understand, she wondered if anyone would tell him the truth.  Lidia picked up the phone and asked for directory assistance a trip to the home would do her some good; this might even help Sandy if she was still there.
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Sandy sat beside the window looking out at the raindrops that hit the window pain.  The smile hid the sadness she felt inside.  No one seemed to understand why she dreamed of her precious Nick.  By keeping him in her dreams then he never left her site.  He was always near her holding her kissing her pain away.
Everyone even her friends thought she had lost her mind.  Didn't they know she knew Nick was gone forever? She missed him so much so she chose to dream of him every night.  In every dream he always looked handsome always smelled the same.  He never aged or changed.  Why was this so wrong of her to think of him like this?  “Mrs Camp someone is here to see you would you like to move to the lounge for your visitor?” Jumping out of her daze she stood slowly beside the nurse.  Lidia sat nervously twisting her hair something she had stopped for a longtime.  But it helped her as she placed strands of hair around her finger and twisted until it hurt, and then she would start over.  She looked up to see Sandy walking into the room; “Would she remember me” she wondered.  Sandy saw a woman who stood up and walked toward her to give her a hug.  Sandy hadn't been hugged in a longtime so backed off so this woman would know she didn't care for hugs anymore.
“Hi Sandy, do you remember me”?  The nurse sat her on the couch and Lidia sat beside her.  Sandy stared at her as if to say “no I don’t think I know you” “My name is Lidia, I met you when you” Lidia stopped there she was being selfish and not thinking of Sandy.  She may not want to hear Nick’s name mentioned.  “I met you at the quilting group that Agnes ran in her home” When Sandy heard Agnes’s name she smiled knowing this name meant happiness from her past.  Lidia felt the smile meant something good so she relaxed and sat back so she could be more comfortable with Sandy and their visit.
“Sandy, how are you?  How have you been? I have missed you not being with us at the group” Lidia didn't have the heart to tell her that she wasn't going anymore.  That would have to wait until Sandy was better; if she ever got better again.
“How is everyone in the group Lidia?” Sandy felt she knew more people than just Agnes.  “Amanda how is she? She belongs to the group if I remember rightly.”  Lidia felt a smile come across her own face This must be a good sign she thought “She is doing well; her restaurant is popular.  She changed the name to ‘The Q’ Factor’ she is fully booked most nights so she doesn't come as much as she would like. She still finds time to make wall hanging quilts and has them in her restaurant”. Sandy felt a bit jealous knowing someone was happy when that was all she ever wanted.  Her right hand started to play with her left wrist out of frustration Sandy found this helped her deal with whatever was happening that day.  Lidia noticed she became fidgety; then Lidia noticed she started scratching her arm and that’s when Lidia noticed Sandy had cuts on her wrists.  “Sandy, what happened to you?  Are you okay?”  Sandy woke out of her daydream of Nick and Tommy and noticed Lidia was staring at her.  She looked down to see the scars that now covered her wrists.  Once again she could tell someone didn't get what they meant to her.  She wondered if Miss Lidia Summer knew REAL pain like Sandy did.  Sandy found she hurt so much inside that one day she had to get all this pain out so she started to self-harm herself.  This surprised Sandy; not that she did it but more because she felt better every time she cut herself.  She didn't want to commit suicide she only wanted the pain to go away.  The pain did go away on the inside anyway; sometimes the pain would still be there only weaker.  She never felt the pain on her wrist.  Sandy was too numb to feel the pain on the outside that was why she tried to get the inside empty of pain.
Lidia waited to hear from Sandy what had happened to her.  Maybe someone attacked her, she knew Sandy had been through a lot but she never felt she would kill herself.  “Sandy, I’m waiting; what happened.”  After a long silence Sandy replied. “Lidia, have you ever had so much pain inside you; pain that went deep into your soul that could never find its way out?”
Lidia thought about what Sandy said, “No Sandy I haven’t why so you ask?”
“Because Lidia that is where I have been; since I lost Nick, Yes I know he died Lidia since that horrible day the pain I have inside me as increased almost on an hourly bases. While I carried our child I couldn't ache for my Nick, I couldn't help but wonder what if?  Maybe I should have gone to work to pick him up?  I had found out that day that we were going to have our first child; I was over the moon while I prepared a special meal for us. I had no idea he was going to take a walk after work.  Thanks to someone else’s selfishness I’m now without him.  I have a son I can no longer see because they feel I’m an unfit mother.  I miss my son and my husband, one I can win back and one I can never have again.  It is because of all of this that I feel the pain; it’s because of this pain I try as hard as I can to get rid of this pain; even if it isn't how others would.  It is how I would and have tried for a longtime now.”  Lidia sat stunned; she didn't know what to say or to do next.  A long silence filled the air when the nurse came over to let Lidia know it was time for Sandy’s medicine and then she needed some rest.  Lidia looked at Sandy as the nurse helped her up and saw someone who had suffered so much; someone who was still suffering now and probably will for the rest of her life.  Lidia knew what she had to do. She said her good-byes As Sandy walked out of the room then Lidia went for a drive.
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Agnes sat at the kitchen table trying to have her diner when the door bell rung.  She slowly walked to the door not sure if she felt like a visitor.  As the door swung open Agnes began to cry.  Lidia looked at her mother and began to cry as well.  Agnes held her arms out hoping her daughter would want to be held by her mom. “Mom”, was all Agnes could hear as Lidia fell into her arms weeping. “Sweetie, I have missed you so.  The two stood in the doorway crying and enjoying the comfort of a single most needed hug anyone could ever wish for.  It seemed to take forever before the tears subsided.  Then Lidia looked up into her mother’s eyes and whispered “I’m sorry mom, please forgive me”
“Sweetie you don’t need forgiveness I’m the one who left you; will you forgive me” “oh yes mom I forgive you” After five minutes of more tears Lidia looked up.  “Mom I know what I need to do”.
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Four months later with the group going strong another member joined this very special group.  He was only a year old but He had a good teacher.  Lidia went to court knowing how it felt to be adopted and raised by people who were never her parents.  She applied for custody for Tommy Nicholas Camp.   Lidia felt that when Sandy was ready to come home (she felt that day would come) then her son would be there for her to bring up as a mother should always do.  Tommy loved being with the group playing with his tankers pretending they delivered milk to the stores.  Lidia loved being his pretend mother.  She knew one day Sandy would be back and healthy as ever; for now she would fill her shoes.
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Four months later the group were laughing and enjoy their time making more quilts when Cindy stopped laughing.  “Hey, guys she said, I have something to tell everyone” Everyone stopped laughing as well afraid more bad news was about to be told by her.  “I’m pregnant! I’m going to have a baby! Isn't that wonderful! Everyone screamed with excitement. She was soon smothered with hugs and kisses.  This was the best news the group had heard in so long. “How does Jack feel Cindy?”  Cindy was laughing and crying at the same time.  “He is over the moon; we've been trying to have another baby for awhile but we wanted to wait until I was pregnant before I told you. I hope you don’t mind I didn't tell you sooner”?  Lidia looked up from her block, “Cindy how pregnant are you?” Cindy sat quiet for a few seconds and then whispered “five months” Then she couldn't stop laughing.  The group understood why she waited to say anything to them.  Soon everyone was laughing again and crying for the joy this baby was sure to bring to Cindy and Jack.
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The months seem to fly by for everyone; Cindy was due soon and looking ready to have her baby any day now.  She was starting to feel nervous remembering how her last delivery had gone.  No one wanted her to go through anything like that again.  Tuesday night rolled around when Cindy was past her due date; no one was worried other mothers-to-be have gone over.  Thirty minutes into the night Cindy felt something happen.  She looked down under-the-table and noticed that her waters had broken.  Agnes could tell by the look on her face the time for this baby to be brought into the world had come.  Everyone rushed around grabbing Cindy calling Jack and getting her to the hospital.  Jack paced the floor waiting to go and help his wife deliver their unborn child.  The doctor came and took Jack into the delivery room; it was time to be the loving husband.  An hour later Jack came in with the biggest smile on his face and told them they had a healthy baby boy.  Agnes was in tears as was Lidia, Amanda, Lucy, and even Tommy started crying because he saw everyone else crying.
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Cindy sat up in bed nice and warm at home waiting for Jack to bring Jackson to her so she could feed him.  No one told her how special this moment could be.  She missed out the last time because of how things went. Cindy wouldn't allow anyone to steal that away from her this time.  Jack walked in carrying a bundle of blankets that held his son and handed him to her as he kissed his wife to let her know she meant the world to him.  The joy of being a mother went deep for Cindy, knowing how special a life could be and could be lost in a blink of an eye.  She told herself she would enjoy every moment while it lasted.
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Amanda stood in the foyer of her restaurant looking over the vast room that was all set and ready to go for the evenings dining guests.  She felt almost complete; there was something missing in her life.  She has a restaurant that is becoming popular.  But when she goes home at night and she is alone.  She knew everyone in the group were happy.  That was well overdue after so many tragedies that we felt.  She did find one of the chef’s she hired seemed handsome to her; she wondered if he would go out with her.  Stuart had worked for Amanda about six months now.  He was good at his work (which she liked) he lived close by on his own.  He had soft blonde hair that he tied back every night he had to work.  His blue eyes with his tanned skin made him an interest among the waitresses as well.  Amanda decided she was going to ask him when he arrived in a few minutes.  What did she have to lose?  The worst he could say was no.
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Lucy sat down at the table after dinner; Edward needed to talk to her about his work.  “Sweetheart, my boss called me into the office this afternoon.  He offered me another position but this position is not here in Maine. It’s back in Arkansas” “what your joking right”  “We just moved from there not long ago, why do they want you back there?”  “The manager there is taking sick leave and won’t be able to work again.  They liked my work so they offered it to me” “So what would you like to do?”  I know it would mean moving back; the bank will pay for this and a bonus because of the second move.  I think I should take it; the pay is an increase and a large one as well. I think I would be making a big mistake to turn this down.”  Lucy sat in shock; she knew his job meant moving a lot but back to the same branch!  After a long silence Lucy took hold of Edward’s hand. “I agree with you honey let’s do it.”
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Stuart arrived at the restaurant and placed his gear in the kitchen like he always did.  Amanda was in the fridge waiting for him to come in and get some supplies.  Stuart jumped as he turned the corner to take out the milk; Amanda spoke to him asking how his day was. “Amanda, are you all right?  Hiding behind the door like that you frightened me”  “Sorry Stuart I wanted to catch you before you started cooking the menu tonight for the first service.”  Stuart looked at her with a question in his eyes.  “How can I help you Amanda”  “I was wondering if Friday night would you go to the club down the road with me?”  “Are you asking me out on a date Miss Amanda?”  A smile came over his lips at the thought she finally noticed him enough to ask something; anything that had nothing to do with work.  “Why Yes I would love to join you this Friday.”  With a smile on her face as well she went out to start doing her part for the menu.
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Agnes waited for the group to arrive for their next session.  They were working on a quilt as a team to place inside Amanda’s restaurant.  Everyone started to arrive including Amanda.  Agnes wondered how she swung this with her job keeping her so busy.  Amanda walked past her gave her a kiss on the check and walked into the dining room.  The atmosphere was full of electricity everyone knew something was going on with Amanda and Lucy.  Lidia wouldn't hold it back any longer she had to ask.  “Who’s going to spill the beans first?”
Amanda looked at Lucy and Lucy looked back at Amanda. “Okay, said Lucy I will go first.  I know we haven’t known each other for as long as the rest of you I feel like you’re a part of my family Edward was offered a manager’s position last week” everyone looked shocked but was happy for her and her family.  “The thing that is the real kicker is its back at the branch were we moved from!” Everyone stopped their work they were surprised.  “How do you feel about this” asked Agnes.  “The children are in shock; Heather is blaming us again for moving her in the first place. Edward  and I feel we should take this position.”  “Then we’re happy for you. We will miss you but this is your life, not ours.”   Then all eyes turned to Amanda waiting for her to share her news.  “What, don’t look at me like that I’m getting there guys; All I wanted to say was that I met someone. Well I knew him already; he works at “G Factor” he is one of the chef’s. His name is Stuart and we had our first date last Friday!”  Lidia looked at her; all she could say was “FINALLY” with that everyone started to laugh.
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Lucy had tears welling up in her eyes.  This was going to be the last time she would be with the quilting group. She was surprised the months went by so fast.  She looked around the table and saw everyone was looking at her with tears as well.  Amanda spoke up.  “I have a wonderful idea.  Let’s change the name of this group I think with so many changes happening a change would do us some good; what does everyone think?”  Agnes being the teacher looked at her with shock and wonder in her eyes. “What would you suggest Amanda”
“I was thinking about the quilt everyone made for the foyer of the restaurant; what would you think of The “Q” Factor?”
Agnes looked surprised. “Amanda that is already taken” “I know that name would be most fitting though Aggie” Agnes was quiet for a moment and then asked what everyone thought of this idea?
The silence around the table lasted a few moments before everyone said they felt this was a brilliant idea.  With that everyone packed up said their good-byes to Lucy knowing the “Q” Factor was going to suit them.
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Agnes felt tired after such a long day with the group.  They did quilting all-day on a Saturday so they could send something for Lucy and her family.  They had moved back six months ago and were missed by the “Q” Factor.  She thought she must ring Lidia in the morning to come and pick up Tommy’s tankers; they left in a hurry so they could make the movies and left them behind.
As Agnes tucked up warm in bed she felt thankful she had so much after having so little for a longtime.
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Lidia was woken early Sunday morning by the phone.  She knew her mom was going to ring; she picked it up half asleep.  Two minutes later Lidia dropped the phone.  Amanda had gone to Aggie's to have lunch with her. Aggie didn't answer the phone so Amanda went to the back door that was unlocked and went in to make sure Aggie was all right.  Amanda found her still in bed; she had fallen asleep and never woke up.
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Lidia sat with Tommy in the church in the front row staring at her mother’s coffin.  She felt robbed again; someone had given her back to her and now she was taken away; this time for a lifetime.  This couldn't happen; Lidia forgot she was getting older it wasn't like Aggie had not lived a life.  Cindy and Jack with Jackson and Kathryn sat behind Lidia.  Amanda and Stuart were next to them with tears streaming down Amanda’s face.  Lucy had come back to be there as support for the “Q” Factor group; the people she grew to love in such a short time.  Lidia felt so alone now even though she knew she had Tommy; this wouldn't last Sandy would back someday to take her son back.  Who would Lidia have then?  The “Q” Factor group stood up to carry their mentor to her last resting place.  The coffin had the last quilt that Aggie had ever made tucked inside to keep her soul warm as she rest her fingers and her soul forever.  The rain fell and tears continued for many months for Lidia.  The group meet one last time to have a farewell party for Caleb, Lisa, Nick, and Aggie.


As the sun set deep into the night Lidia closed her eyes seeing each person that had once belonged to the quilters group over the ten years she took part.  She saw Agnes, the one who was her mentor and her mother, Nick the one who lost his love then found her again; then through a twist of fate lost his own life.  Then there was Cindy, who learned the hard way how it felt to lose someone who should have touched her life.  Amanda: the dreamer of owning her own place found love and her own place to cook food.  Lisa, the only one who cared about her health found out she had breast cancer that took her life soon after.  Lucy she came to our group six months after Lisa died.  She had a smile that lit up the room and made us all. Lucy came in and left so fast it was a shame she had to move so soon after arriving; she did come back for Aggie s funeral her support will never be forgotten.  Then there was Tommy he touched my life more than I could have ever imagined.  Sandy got better and came back for her son.  After six months she saw how he missed me his second mom.  She brought him back knowing it was easier for everyone.  She still comes and visits him every month.  The loss of Agnes took a toll on all of us.  We never met for quilting again the quilt we made as a family still hangs in the restaurant today forever loved.
The end


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